


Are You Breaking Up With Me?

by hungryandparanoid



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: 6000 Years of Slow Burn, Drunk Crowley, Drunk confessions, First Kiss, Fluff, I cannot believe the first thing I’m posting is about these nerds, Idiots in Love, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-05-16 10:54:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19316743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hungryandparanoid/pseuds/hungryandparanoid
Summary: “Are you breaking up with me?” Crowley sits up in sudden realisation.“I’m sorry, w-““You are!” Crowley points a finger accusingly at his much more sober and extremely confused counterpart.After the ‘almost Armageddon’ Aziraphale wants to talk with Crowley. Crowley wants to get wasted.





	Are You Breaking Up With Me?

What was quite very almost Armageddon had past, not that the pair had much to do with the success of it. If anything they turned out to be background characters in what they originally thought was their own show, the two didn’t mind this of course. If you were to ask them, it would be fantastic to not have a narrator down your neck repeating every move you make and stupid thought you have-even it if that narrator just so happened to be the “all mighty”.

The two made great use of Anges Nutter’s final proficiency, “Choosing their faces wisely” indeed. Though it wasn’t exactly a low stress operation the two took great joy in realising that their (or more Agnes’s) prediction was correct, finally giving them a chance to stand up (in character of course) to their partners respective sides. 

After the mess was over, the two did the obvious thing to do after you almost lose everything; have your annual dinner at the Ritz. 

It wasn’t the first time the pair had dined there and it certainly wouldn’t be the last but despite that there was an undeniable change in the air. This was the first time the pair were almost certain they were free of the two sides control and were definitely certain they didn’t really care about heaven and hells opinions on anything anyway.

Azirapahale ate a lemon curd meringue tart. Crowley, not as much a fan of food as his angelic counterpart, had a coffee. The two ate like always, shared witty banter like always, looked like always, and, like always, the two got up, left a generous tip, and exited the venue.

“Come back to the shop?” Aziraphale suggested. Normally that was what followed there meals.

“You got anything good?” Crowley replied. They would usually go back for a drink afterwards. Aziraphale nods, he’s always got something ready to share.

“Good.”

__

Crowley the demon-or ex demon-(he wasn’t very sure anymore) took a minute before re-entering the once ablaze shop. It was different now that he was in his own body. Now he could see Aziraphale and the shop together, both close to normal, both fairly safe, and both, from where he was standing at least, not on fire. If you gave Crowley the choice, he would much prefer not to experience that again any time soon, or even later. Really, the past couple of days he would happily go about experiencing just the once. He would also enjoy not feeling as though he had come dangerously close to losing that which mattered the most to him in his recently extended lifetime. (And no-he wasn’t referring to the oversized rock he was currently standing on nor his precious Bentley who moved him around it.)

Aziraphale noticed his friends hesitance so he took the liberty of entering the shop first, and then subtly gesturing for the demon to follow. Crowley snapped out of whatever strange trance he was in and entered the small shop. Aziraphale got a clear message from his friend that he wanted to pretend he didn’t freeze outside of the door of the dingy bookshop, so Aziraphale does too-(For now at least).

__

The two were a couple of drinks in. Aziraphale kept looking at Crowley with a strange expression, resulting in the demon drinking much more in a much shorter amount of time then the angel, which in his case was far to much, even for a celestial being.

“Ah, Crowley?” Crowley looks up from whatever alcoholic substance was currently filling his glass.

“Yes angel?” He replied, most totally not mostly hammered, trying, and failing, to keep the same level of eye contact Aziraphale seemed determined to preserve.

“I was thinking, since we are now, as you put it, ‘on our own side’, the Arrangement doesn’t really make much sense any more.” 

Crowley took a big gulp of whatever was in this glass. He was quite confused. He thought that he should probably sober up for this conversation but then decides that he really doesn't feel like doing so. Aziraphale seemed nervous as he waited for some sort of confirmation from his partner. Crowley tries his hardest to make sense of what the angel is trying to say, despite being as the kids would say, ‘totally shitfaced’, so he just went with nodding.

“Right, so, I was thinking that perhaps-“

“Are you breaking up with me?” Crowley sat up in sudden realisation. Aziraphale seemed extremely taken aback by his counterparts sudden outburst.

“I’m sorry, wha-“

“You are!” Crowley points a finger accusingly at his much more sober and extremely confused counterpart. Aziraphale puts down his glass on his desk.

“‘s because I’m a ‘wily old ssserpent’” the demon slurred, shaking his finger while doing that strange tongue thing that only a choice few would find ‘endearing’. (That ‘choice few’ does not include that poor man selling churros a couple blocks down).

“No-what?” Aziraphale spluttered “Actually what I was trying to say is-”

“No it’s fine!” The demon cut in, “It’s not like your my best friend and I-I mourned you or anything, or or or like your the only thing I lo-like in this shit hole” he said, waving his arms about like the depressed drunk idiot he was currently acting like.

“You- really?” Aziraphale said quite surprised. It wasn’t every day you find out someone mourned you, especially when you seem to appear quite physically intact. Crowley nods very violently.

“I’m stupid! I always- I’m always all like ‘hey angel you're my favourite let’s run off together’ and you say I ’go too fast’ for you. So I try to move slow but it’s reallllyyyyyy slow azir-azzrapp-angel. Sooo slow. And then you died and I ran in and I thought-“

“That I was executed?” Aziraphale finished. Crowley nods again, this time with much less vigour. Aziraphale thinks for a minute and suddenly his eyes go wide.

“I’m your best friend?! You said at the bar? The one you lost?” Crowley looks so desperately divided. Aziraphale is pleased to know that the demon didn’t lose anyone important to him, and not that he would admit it to anyone but he felt a certain pride about having the title of Crowley’s ‘best friend’.

“You can be so dense sometimes. Maybe would should break up.” Crowley said taking another sip of his drink. Aziraphale contemplated all this new information for a few minutes while Crowley continued muttering about ‘stupid beautiful angels’ before walking across the room and taking the cup off of Crowley who verbally disagrees but didn’t fight his action. 

“You keep talking about breaking up. Are we... dating?” Aziraphale asks after placing the demons cup out of his reach. Crowley nodded as he lifted his finger to his mouth.

“Yes but ssshhhhh your not allowed to know or I might lose you for real and I don’t know what I would do without you cause I…” the demon looked around the room, the walls don’t appear to have any ears but you can never be sure these days. “...I loveeeee you” Aziraphales eyes went wide, that was the final trigger for the angel.

“Crowley sober up” 

“Wha-“

“Sober up please”

Crowley did that and the demon got the most splitting headache in the process. This of course was nothing compared to the complete and utter regret and embarrassment when he realised what he had just been saying.

“Aziraphale-“ he began,

“Did you mean it?” The angel looks serious. Crowley couldn’t even try to lie about his actions under that gaze. It is hard to believe it but Aziraphale can be quite intimidating when he chooses.

“Well,,, ah,,, yes. Fine. I did. I understand if you never wanna see me again but I can’t help it you're just a spectacular mess and even though I am, or at least I thought I wasn’t physically capable of doing so- I love yo-“

That was when the angels lips came messily crashing down onto the shocked demon’s. Crowley completely short circuited. Was this a dream? Is this a mistake? Why would he-They pull apart with both faces flushed furiously.

“Aziraphale I-“ Crowley started, fixing his glasses.

“I love you too Crowley” Aziraphale said sternly cutting the demon off from whatever nonsense she was going to go on about. Crowley, to his surprise actually believes the angel. Aziraphale leans down and kisses his forehead with a loving gaze.

“But I think we are both a bit of a ‘spectacular mess’, wouldn’t you agree?” The angel asked, smiling so wide you could see the creases near his eyes. Crowley laughed and begrudgingly yet wholeheartedly agreed. 

And that’s how they spent the rest of the night and whatever came after. The experience is different but so very warm and familiar.

**Author's Note:**

> I haven’t written anything let alone a romantic fanfiction in 3 years cut my tired ass some slack.


End file.
